Weekend

 It wasn't a bad weekend. The weather yesterday wasn't that good but it is still spring time however lucky we've been to have such nice days lately. There were even - gasp - snow flakes! Luckily today was bright and sunny and a breezy. I had a dentist appointment early - yuck - that I've been dreading for days. I, of course, survived it. I just get so anxious. I went for a later walk today. I usually take anxiety medicine before going to the dentist and it tends to leave me really sleepy. I was hoping the walk would wake me up a little bit but I still fell asleep in the afternoon! So really not a lot got done today. 

A little bit of positive news - so keep your fingers crossed - but Mum has been doing a tiny walk with her walker - just across the living room floor, but she's been moving a little bit! It's more than she's been doing for weeks. I am so hoping this is a good sign. I shall be Skyping with her on Wednesday again so I shall see then. 

Photo today: - another sign of spring - turtles!

Semi-Productive Day

 It wasn't raining this morning - as forecast - but the temperature had dropped and it was quite cloudy out. My friend and I went for a walk and then I went home. I got my usual stuff done. It was too cold to sit outside and get lost in bird watching. I did lose myself in a book for a while. BUT on the plus side I got a couple of extras done that I've been putting off. I actually dyed my hair today! The grey has been out of control and, frankly, I've been feeling off and really couldn't be bothered to colour it. Today I decided to just do it. I'm glad I did! I feel a little better. Isn't it strange how something so little can cheer you up a bit? I also got some boxes and cleaning up done that I just haven't had the motivation to do. I'm actually quite pleased though it was something so little. 

I was planning to go up in the craft room tonight as I haven't been up all week (can you believe it??). Usually I at least go up there and do something. I haven't. Anyway, I got distracted by the book. I ended up finishing it and getting some photos sorted. That was my evening. I shall get up there tomorrow!

Tomorrow we have to go and help son pick up something from the shops. It won't fit in his car so husband is taking the work van. We're I'm hoping to visit a lighthouse on my 2021 list and see the daffodils. Hopefully it will work out. 

THINGS I'M GRATEFUL FOR 

- My sister. I don't know what I'd do without her caring for Mum and keeping in contact with me daily. We were never really close - she's six years older than me - but I am so very grateful for her. 

- Technology. Just talking to Mum and being able to see her brings me...solace, comfort, joy. I don't know how to describe it. Makes me happy and sad at the same time. 

- Daughter. She's been checking in on me frequently. 

PHOTO OF THE DAY

I saw a daisy!!!! I can't believe it. Just one. Growing by itself in the park. 

Flying By/Mum update

 I can't believe how quickly this week has passed by! Last night I realised it was Wednesday and had been a while since I posted, but by the time I remembered I was already tucked up in bed and just couldn't be bothered to get out again. The week has been flying by but, admittedly, I haven't got a whole lot done except for the normal things. 

I Skyped with Mum yesterday. She is still coughing, still isn't moving a lot or able to do anything for herself, but she did seem a little more cheerful. She has been on anti-depressants for a couple of weeks so hopefully they are starting to work. I haven't asked at all what she remembers about when she got sick, but she did talk about it a little yesterday. Made me quite sad and tearful, though I was careful not to cry in front of her. I really think she thought she was going to die in her chair and no-one would know. I was wondering if this is part of why she's not motivated, that she is afraid to be alone again. It was good to talk to her, but sad at the same time as she is not herself at all, still very confused and can't remember basic things. I am beginning to realise that this might just be how she is now. It's tough to wrap my head around as she was always so independent and strong. 

Mum did have her first Covid vaccination last Friday and did fine with it, no side effects. I was quite worried, but thankful that she managed to get it. Somebody came to the house and gave it to her. 

Daffodils beginning to push up through the dead leaves. Daffodils always remind me of Mum. She always used to grow them at the house when I was growing up and when I see them I always think of her. 

Week Done

 Friday again. 

Feeling a little more productive towards the end of the week. I've been trying my hardest not to be distracted so I don't have to think. Honestly I think that keeping busy doing things stops me from having to think as much but it's not as fun as daydreaming or photography. 

I did get some tidying up of my craft room done this week though there is a lot more to be done. I did make time to actually do some crafty stuff as well as just sorting. 

A couple of cards to add to the card box. I also worked on a mini-album I started a while ago. I was doing so well using some paper pads and then, well, then life happened. I found that I really enjoyed working on the album and I had more in the works so I shall be sorting out the papers and starting on them.

Things to be thankful for this week:-

* Skype with Mum on Wednesday

* Sunshine

* Chatting with daughter (even if she did keep nagging me to get something done - which I did get done in the end lol).

* Walking with Joanie, my walking friend. 

* Sister, for taking care of Mum when I can't be there and keeping in contact with me about all that's going on. 

* First vaccine dose

Sunny Wednesday

 Halfway through the week again. Wow it's been a year since lockdown began! I remember the whole toilet paper thing in the states around this time, chatting with Mum and laughing about it with her and then it hit England. It's my oldest sister's birthday today. She turned 60 last year and they managed to go out for a family meal before lockdown just a couple of days later. We didn't know then how long things were going to take. 

I Skyped with Mum today. Sadly she doesn't seem to be doing any better. She knew who I was but she didn't realise where I was. Very confused. My sister (middle one is the one she's staying with) says they think it is Covid Delirium. Never heard of it. I had to actually Google it and the symptoms do sound like Mum with confusion and perhaps hallucinations. Last week she thought something was dripping on her head and neck and got quite upset about it. I don't know where things will go from here. I enjoy chatting with her, but I also feel a sense of sadness afterwards as she's not how she used to be and I know that she'd be so upset with how she is now. I'm not sure how to reconcile that. 

Deep Breath.

Positive Things: 

- The sun has been shining A LOT! It is very nice to see the sun. It makes me feel a little bright. 

- I got my first Covid vaccination! Who knew that getting a vaccine could make you so excited? I got the Pfizer one. I had a sore arm in the evening but that was it. In three weeks time I go back for my second one. I registered at several places and have since heard from another so maybe things are starting to get moving. 

- I listened to the lovely song recommended by a reader - Amanda. The song is Red-Winged Blackbird by James Keelaghan. It's a wonderful song and so reminded me of the bird. 

A lovely sunrise silhouette from Sunday morning. Husband and I were going out for our Sunday Adventure when I saw the sun rising and had him pull over into the park where I was each weekday morning. What a wonderful start to the day!

Plodding Along

 Well I'm plodding along in life. Last week we had some wonderful weather here in Michigan and I walked quite a bit. It was really lovely. Today it feels like winter again. I suppose that's what Spring is all about. I'm glad that all the ice has gone from my walk. It feels so lovely to be able to walk without my Yaktrax on and just my hiking boots! 

I was really glad to see my first spring flowers - Snowdrops. I remember where I saw a few last spring and went to check on them. Sure enough they were up! I was so pleased. 

My walking friend and I decided to go and see if there were any daffodils coming up and were excited to see them start peeping through the fallen leaves. So wonderful to see the new growth. 

Another sure sign of spring here in  Michigan is the return of the Red-winged Blackbird. Their call heralds the return of spring. I love seeing them in the trees and listening to them sing their song. 

I am waiting for the urge to spring clean to come upon me, but it hasn't yet. I've been thinking about sorting and decluttering but that's as far as I've got so far. Sigh. I hate to say it but I need a really rainy, horrible day where I'm not tempted to go walking and I actually get some things around here done!

Tuesday Mutterings

Thanks for the comments!

Eileen T. - Yes, #1Day12Pics is through AYWMC (A Year with My Camera). I completed the course in 2017. It's how I learned to use my camera properly. I continued on with EDPS Camera Club (Emma's paid camera club). I was one of the first people who joined the club so got a really great lifetime membership. We still do the monthly #1Day12Pics. Any large project I had in mind got put to the backburner when Mum got sick. I can't seem to concentrate or make plans about much of anything. I am going to try to do this monthly project though with a different theme each month.

The days have been plodding along. I haven't been getting much of anywhere. Mum is still the same. The doctor is going to prescribe some anti-depression pills as they seem to think that is part of the problem. I suppose if you go from being independent to not being able to do the simplest things it might make you a little depressed. Hoping this will help. 

I've been out enjoying the sunshine. Walking a lot - too much probably. Yesterday I had a headache that wouldn't stop and ended up having to go to bed early. I hate the ones like that. I end up feeling sick and just can't bear to move. The only thing that seems to help is sleep. 

Thursday is supposed to be a rainy day so I have a list of things that I've been putting off that I need to get done that day. No excuses! I have to play catch-up. On a good note the library is opening again and with it the bookstore. I shouldn't be shopping there but it's been a whole year! I also have boxes of books to donate. You have to call to make an appointment and I put it off for the few weeks they were open and accepting donations. They need to go! I definitely won't miss the books. They have been packed up in boxes for months and (apart from the space they are taking up) I haven't given them a thought!

All being well I am going to Skype with Mum tomorrow. I hope she's well enough. I've got some fun news to share. Apologies to my wonderful MIL who I haven't told either but who reads this blog (I just sent an email and forgot to tell her). 

Some of my photos and a small article got published in a free local magazine! I lack confidence and doing this was really a big step for me (so much so I didn't tell anyone and my poor stomach ached for days). Hopefully this is the first of me putting myself out there. I do want to work on some wildlife cards too. 

Saturday

 Thanks for all the lovely messages yesterday. We can certainly use all the good thoughts, prayers and such that are available. 

Mum had a bit better day today. She did eat some and asked to have a Sunday Roast tomorrow - good sign I hope. I really hope things look brighter, but I'm beginning to realise there will be up days and down days. There have just seemed to be more down days for Mum lately but hoping for a turn to brighter days. 

It was cold here today, but bright and sunny. We went out for a little while. It's the first Saturday of the month and, for my online camera club, we usually do something called #1day12pics. The idea is that you take a series of pictures from throughout your day. I am determined to do one each month with a different theme. I like getting out and taking photos. It makes me forget about things for a little while. Today I decided the theme would be Textures. 

While looking around my garden I was so excited to see that little purple flower. The snow has barely melted (in some places it hasn't) but the little flower was coming up. It is so tiny, smaller than my little fingernail but so welcomed!

I hope everyone had a good Saturday. 

Wow - a Week Has Passed

 ...since I last posted. I didn't mean it to be so long. I'm plodding through the days and they sort of seem to be blending together.

Mum is still the same. No improvement. My sister is struggling. There seems to be lots of doctor calls and visits from medical professionals, but they don't seem to be communicating much with each other. It is getting very frustrating for my sister. Yesterday it looked as though they would be admitting Mum back into the hospital, but when she got there they decided not to and sent her back home again! Mum isn't eating much or drinking either. 

There is some improvement on the communication between my two sisters and Mum. I'm not going into details, but my older sister is now coming so that my sister who is caring for Mum can have a break a few times a week. Also they both talked to Mum and told her that she needs to be more verbal about telling people when she isn't feeling well or what is hurting or what she's having trouble with. Mum is old-fashioned, stiff upper lip and just getting on with it. When she's asked how she's feeling she will just say fine even if she's not. I have to admit I do that too. But right now that's not good for her. They can't help if they don't know what's wrong. 

Life is still going on. The days are getting longer. I can't believe we are in March now! The snow is starting to melt and there are hints of some things start to grow. My husband had to clean up some bird seed in the garden. It had fallen on the ground and been buried in snow and now that the snow has melted there is just a mess!  

I have blogs to catch up on as I admit that I haven't been on the computer too much. It's a good way to spend a Friday evening. 

I shall chalk this week up to a fail on the blogging side of things and start again!